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Gay proposes that we watch these shows to make ourselves feel better.
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Just good old fashion support and empowerment.
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So how can I watch these shows that make a complete mockery out of women, femininity and gender roles? My husband and I haven’t had cable TV in a long, long time, but I still can’t think of one reality show whose sole mission is to set women up for success – no manipulation, no editing for drama, no cattiness. I believe in supporting women’s ideas, leadership and strength. One thing I’m passionate about is empowering my female friends. The more I thought about this, the more it bothered me. Until Gay’s essays, however, my thoughts never went so far as to wonder if that was ok. I know that what I’m watching isn’t “real.” I know it is incredibly manipulated and edited to achieve a certain result. And yet, I can be just as easily sucked into a Bravo, “Real Housewives” marathon same as anyone else. I would say that no, I don’t take pleasure in seeing my friends or family humiliated. They would not exist if we didn’t tune in by the millions to watch.Įven more cringe-worthy, Gay points out that by watching these “reality” shows where women are asked to compete for love, forced into uncomfortable situations and generally manipulated into becoming their worst selves, we are activity participating in their humiliation.
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Much like our complaints about the commercialism and ridiculous wages of professional athletes and sports, our criticisms about the participants in reality shows are uber-hypocritical. And before you start to criticize the contestants on these reality shows, I can’t help but first ask you to remember that these shows would not exist without our willing participation and viewership. In reality TV, men and women – but especially women – are required to perform our sick and twisted hyperboles of gender, all in the name of entertainment.
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The genre has developed a very successful formula for reducing women to an awkward series of stereotypes about low self-esteem, marital desperation, the inability to develop meaningful relationships with other women, and an obsession with an almost pornographic standards of beauty. Gay doesn’t hold punches when she describes the reality, of reality TV: Gay asks us to look beyond the superficial guise of “entertainment” and to ask ourselves what these shows – and our enjoyment of them – say about us as a culture. I was particularly struck by her close examination of reality TV. In her essays, Gay analyzes everything from books, to TV shows, to films. This isn’t just a collection of essays about being a woman or about feminism it’s about race, culture and and a host of other topics that we typically try to ignore. “Bad Feminist” surprised me in it’s thoughtfulness and it’s range.
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I’ll read almost anything based on other people’s suggestions! I instantly added it to my latest list of books I wanted my husband to bring home from the library for me to read. A couple of weeks ago, one of my friends posted a picture on Instagram of the latest book she was reading: “Bad Feminist” by Roxane Gay.